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Secrets

by on June 29, 2011

I watched a pretty amazing movie City Island that got me thinking about keeping secrets. You should see the movie, so I’ll refrain from ruining it.

Helped me realize how I build up so many little secrets – keeping secrets about saying something ‘stupid’, many other things …

For example my partner has this tendency to tell me that he brought up things I’ve said at work. When I make a funny uninformed remark about anatomy, for example (he works in a clinic).

I say “Whhhyyy did you tell them that?”
He says “It was funny. Why not?”
Me “Becausssseeeee”

That ‘because’ really means ‘that occurrence was a secret! I didn’t tell you it was a secret, but it was. I’m embarrassed, and I don’t want you reminding people that I’ve never taken an anatomy course and didn’t know XYZ’ [note, now have taken some as related to yoga. but I’m very interested in taking gross anatomy now.]

You know how sometimes the people you love make the same point for days and weeks and months and years, and it’s not until you hear it from somewhere else that you realize they’re completely right? Mike doesn’t keep secrets, doesn’t see the point of putting on that weighted vest, if you will.

Secrets are stupid. City Island is a lot about lying, but with the ‘tiny’ secrets I’ve kept, it’s probably been tantamount to lying at some times.

Keeping our own secrets is exhausting. And tiring. And sometimes destructive (see the movie). I’ve decided I’m done, that I want to have no secrets. Sure, I won’t put them on the internet, but when asked, I’d like to think I’d volunteer the information now.

Just some thoughts on truth and trying to lighten the load.

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From → Spirit

One Comment
  1. Guerrilla Yogi permalink

    you asked “You know how sometimes the people you love make the same point for days and weeks and months and years, and it’s not until you hear it from somewhere else that you realize they’re completely right?”

    Yes! My parents always made statements that sounded cryptic at the time: “take the good from others and ignore the bad…early to bed, early to rise…take care of yourself before you take care of others” and so on. Day after day, these are crystallizing into my own honest behaviors. Thanks for posting!

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